My brother is the biggest idiot on this planet...but I love him.

I'm going to talk a little about dreams tonight, but I feel I need to talk and tell a story i've told many times lately I feel I need to explain something and try to get things of my chest. I just want to write it all down. I suppose I'm going to be Mickiililly for tonight, she writes to get things off her chest, explain things, ask questions she writes them on her blog too.  Right...

 My 14 year old brother is the most annoying person in the world. He trips me up for no reason, shouts at me, takes the TV remote of me and uses a hose to 'wash my bedroom windows'. He hurts me, punches me, kicks me...and I hurt him back. Sometimes I wish he would just leave the house for a long while. You know, give me some sort of peace.

  A couple of weeks ago he was taken to hospital, his neck was twitching badly and he couldn't talk during those twitches. I wasent there when it started I was at my boyfriends house so my mum called me and told me what was happening. I was worried and scared but I thought that it couldn't be that bad. So I went to my Nan's to sleep but ended up walking back to mine at 1am. When I got up in the morning he came back and I saw how bad it actually was. He was continually twitching and It panicked me to see him like that...it looked like he was having a fit.
 He went in for countless amounts of tests but they all came back negative, nada...nothing. They couldn't explain why. We had a feeling it was nerve damage. The week before he got into a fight at a local fair. A boy came up to him drunk and told my brother that he had wanted a fight. Punches were thrown and my brother tried to walk away but this other boy grabbed him and shoved him down to let about 8 people kick at him while he was on the floor. That night he came back fine, went skating the next day.
    After a while he got a lot better. Not better as such but he got used to them. He went back to school for a day, but a teacher told him that he should go to a disabled school. But he seemed to get better and better. The twitches where still there I could see that but he was talking through them more clearly he wasent jerking that much.
   Last week he managed to knock himself out twice in one night. He stabbed himself in the head with his house key causing him to pass out. He smashed a pint glass over his head (which didn't knock him out) his forehead is scratched up now. And he smashed his head against his bedroom wall. He has a phobia of the hospital and he went missing in another town for a while. The doctors say it's now pointing towards epilepsy. He passes out on his own now falls down slightly and stares into nothing sometimes. Right now he's trying to speak to my mum but shouting because his twitches are getting bad because of the stress. He has to go to the hospital tomorrow for (hopefully) more tests. As he has a phobia of the hospital it's really stressing him out and making him worse. It's really hard for me to listen and see him go through all this and I can't imagine what he must of been feeling these past weeks.
 He's being really strong for us. He afraid, we can see that, but he's being so strong. And I do feel bad when I cry about this I can't help it. He's my little brother. My 'baby baba' as I used to call him. And If something was to happen to him I really don't know what I'd do. But he'll be fine. He's strong, so strong.

But anyway...
Last night I had five dreams in one night! Five!! New record :D
Most of them didn't make too much sense to be honest and I woke up not very refreshed. I suppose that's what I have to pay for a vivid imagination. Not too much right?

Sweet dreams ~Nanashi.

     

Sleepfull-less Nights and Dreams after Dreams.

*yawn*
 I'm tired almost all the time at the moment, not gonna lie have been wondering why considering I get the full 8 hours a night sometimes slightly more.
 Yesterday I had a nap at my boyfriends house and I talked to him (in my sleep). Can't remember what he told me I said, but afterwards we came to the conclusion that I can't be in a deep sleep if I'm talking or remembering dreams. Which means i'm practically half awake for most of the night so I don't get the right amont of sleep. Nights where I havent had any dreams I wake up bright eyed and bushy tailed, but in the morning after a night of dreams i'm groggy and grumpy.
  Sleepfull-less Nights.
Also I've been getting dreams after dreams... Lets say I have a dream about a naked cut up girl walking towards me with a broken piece of mirror in her hand with the intent of mutilating and/or killing me.  (yes, one of my resent dreams) After I have the dream It will go black for a little bit then I'll be in my boyfriends room telling him about the dream I just had, just as I would if it were in real life. So I wake up confused. Have I actually talked to anyone about it yet? Then I realize Nah, Dreams after Dreams...'tis all good.
It's almost 11 so imma get to bed for a half nights sleep.

SweetDreams Nanashi~

What have people done in their sleep?

I've walked out into the garden once and just stood their for half an hour. I've started to make myself dinner, I've hit myself in the face, I've hit others in the face, bruised myself and talked. Many people sleep soundly, the occasional dream but not much else. In that way I can call myself kind of special.
   But others have done things that can put my antics to shame. It's amazing that some people can do things in their sleep that they would never do in their waking hours or end up doing something outrageous and not remember it at all.
   It's amazing how the human mind works without us knowing it.
 I looked up some crazy things that people have done in their sleep on the internet and it surprised me with how people could do these kind of things without realizing.

  A fifteen year old girl from England climbed to the top of 130ft crane in her sleep. She was found at 2am where firefighters asked her parents to wake her so they could get her down safety.

 An Australian woman would sleepwalk out of her house at night and pick up complete strangers and then have sex with them. Her husband found out when he saw used condoms around the house. He followed her out at night and caught her having sex with a man she did not know and found that she was still asleep. The part of her mind that stops her from moving in her dreams wasn't working properly so she would move alot in her sleep.

  Someone in the 1900's got out of bed and walked to his in law's house. When he arrived he strangled his father-in-law into unconsciousness and stabbed his mother-in-law to death afterwards. He was not found guilty because he was asleep and did not remember doing this at all after he woke up.

People have also conducted, driven, swum, emailed, scoffed themselves and jumped out a window in their sleep. About 10% of people actually sleep walk but only a few of them actually do something extremely out of the ordinary in their sleep.
  Hopefully nothing happens to me tonight!

SweetDreams! ~Nanashi

Have you ever thought: 'Fuck this shit'?

I have many times. Call me lazy and what not but sometimes I just don't want to try anymore. I can't deal with this lack of sleep at the moment, I don't want to see this dream anymore. I think I've had enough.
 I can't function properly in school and I'm scared to close my eyes. It just feels so fucking real.
I'm not going to describe the dream by the way as it's quite personal but... I don't like it, don't want to see it, once was enough but 3 times already?
 In the Disney film 'Cinderella' there is a song with the name 'A dream is a wish your heart makes' Fuck that shit also. My heart must be so messed up to wish these sorts of things. 
 Rabbit girls, White halls with fire, death, water darts, amnesia, monkeys, funerals, internal bleeding, blue roses, guro, helicopters, icecream, motorbikes, blinding, piano, suicide and drowning. Wishes? Some maybe but not many.

Sweet Dreams ~Nanashi

Feel Neglected?

I've flown a helicopter into a clothes line, beaten up 3 boys who thought they could steal some ice cream from me, seen things that I would never want to see again, driven motorcycles that are far too small for me, been blinded by bleach, went to a pub to listen to piano, saw someone I don't know jump of a cliff to commit suicide because 'it was safe' and watched cats slip around on some ice and then drown. All since the 23rd of May. At night of course, in my dreams. And I'm sure there are plenty more that I can't remember.

I'm sorry blog. I've been neglecting you.

I've been paintballing, video gaming, sleeping, eating and rain walking in my real life. Not as exciting but I think I prefer it that way. As I've said before my dreams feel very real. I usually wake up in a panic and that lasts for about 30 seconds to a minute and then I realize...'Dream...' And relax a little. I should have gotten used to it by now but they seem so real that it's hard not to panic. Ive been going to bed later and later and getting up earlier and earlier, taking naps during the day. I have school tomorrow...aha should be fun!
  Anyway. Not much else to say really...so I'm off.

Sweet Dreams ~Nanashi

BLOGFISH?!

Yeah yeah, I should be in bed cause I have school...today?
Well I'm not sleepy yet I'm watching an anime called 'Gravitation', drinking DrPepper and feeding my BlogFish.
BLOGFISH?
If you go to the bottom of this page RIGHT NOW there will be a light blue rectangle. Just hover your mouse over it and click.BLOGFISH! So much amusement...

SweetDreams~Nanashi

Guro?

 I'm in my bedroom with my boyfriend and were playing on the Xbox, nothing unusual about anything. He takes me down playfully and holds me on the floor with one hand...he pulls out a knife. He says to me 'Don't worry this wont hurt at all, trust me.' He slides the knife across one of my breasts, cutting it open. I don't feel a thing, no pain. He takes some of my skin in his hand and playfully leaves the room leaving me on the floor.

 So yeah...I wake up and I have blood on my hands. I panic and obviously check my chest area...nothing wrong there. Turns out I had hit myself in the face during the night and gave myself a nose bleed. *facepalm*


SweetDreams ~Nanashi

Do Blues Roses Exist?

I don't think they do in real life but in my dream they did.

     I had gone to school, as normal and where I usually sit at lunch there was a newly planted rose bush.
The bush had the normal red roses on it but it also had blue roses. I picked lots of blue roses and took them home. I then spent ages trying to find a blue rose bush on the internet. I asked my boyfriend to buy me some blue roses if he saw any but we couldn't buy them anywhere. I asked the school where they had bought it from but they refused to tell me so I dug up the rose bush and planted it in my garden. I had lots of dried blue roses around my room. Very pretty. 
 Short dreams are short at the moment, I have 2 or 3 of them a night now. I prefer these short dreams to the longer ones I get more variety, so I'm not watching the same program for 2 hours a night...half an hour will do, thanks.
 
SweetDreams ~Nanashi

Internal Bleeding Kills!!!

 Had two dreams last night. I can't remember most of them to be honest, but I thought...Heck why not write them up anyway?. So here I am...writing them up anyway.

 Dream 1: Pirates of the Caribbean.
   I'm living on this island in a wooden house, all is peaceful there. My Mother, Baby sister and Step-dad come knocking on my door (I don't know them in the dream) and ask for somewhere to sleep. I build them a house and they go live there. I have to mix the baby milk for my little sister as they can't seem to remember how to make it. The next thing I remember I'm under a small boat with my friend and were under the sea. You know, like the scene in The Curse Of The Black Pearl.


Dream 2: Internal Bleeding Kills!!!
   I'm walking home from school, and these people are following me home. They are shouting abuse at me and throwing stones and the sort at me. I call my boyfriend but at first he doesn't  pick up. So I call him again and he says that he can't come out because he is ill. But before I get to his house I have to go back from school. I get there and we have to song a song and dance to it...after I did it it was put on Youtube. I showed my boyfriend and he didn't like it at all. And so I went back to school. The same people were shouting abuse at me again and I got upset. My friend says to me 'Why are you getting so worked up about it, they aren't hurting you. Are they?' I shout back 'Internal bleeding kills!'  and started crying. I also wake up crying. 


 So there you go. Dreams!
   I have school tomorrow and I told myself that I would be in bed by 10pm. Its now 10:42pm and I'm not sleepy at all.
 But on a happy note I got a Monster Book Of Manga from a friend today, it will help me with my drawing so thats good!

SweetDreams ~Nanashi.

Nightmares.

 For people who also have vivid dreams you must know what it's like to have a proper Nightmare. I know, everyone has had a nightmare at least once in their lives but has everyone had a Nightmare where they feel like they can't escape it, or felt like it's not even a Nightmare, but reality?
    Most of the time I can't tell whether I'm in the Land of Dreams or whether I've yet to travel there for the night. Everything is just so vivid, I feel everything I'm supposed to feel in real life, the emotion the movement the pain it all feels so real. I have to admit, it scares me. Sometimes I feel genuinely scared to go to sleep on my own.
   They're just dreams right?


 SweetDreams ~Nanashi.